Friday, March 28, 2008

The surreal life

Things are feeling a bit surreal around here. My husband, with his serious blood disease and varices in danger of bursting, but who looks completely healthy, is running around getting things organized for the big event. He's done the taxes, arranged his medical leave with the dean of his school, and found a temporary replacement to take over his job as chair of his department. Right now he's off taking a load of stuff to Goodwill, and after that, will go to the blood bank where they'll take blood to put aside incase he starts bleeding during surgery and needs a transfusion. Just another busy day....

As for me, I've got a list of things to do:
1. Clean house because people are coming to stay and help out
(and, of course, the cleanliness of my house is all my loved ones
will the thinking about when my husband's in the hospital!).
2. Get a cut and color for my hair (because when a gal's in crisis, she
has to look her best).
3. Stock the pantry and freezer with ready-to-eat foods from Trader Joe's
(well, at least THAT's not nuts!).
4. Do every scrap of laundry in the house.

It's clear, even to me, that most of this list is a feeble attempt to assert control over a situation that I have no control over. Which, I guess, is OK. Now that I'm coming out of my shocked stupor, I have to keep busy, doing something, anything, to keep from feeling helpless. Silly me.

13 comments:

yellowdog granny said...

you need a me moment...even a me hour...just go off someplace..have a dublin dr.pepper..that always works for me..something bad for you to make you feel good about you..sodie pop and a moon pie..
will run by and light some more candles on the way to work..js

Elizabeth said...

I know. But it's hard for me to make that happen for myself.... Moon pies. Mmmm. My family is from the South, and we loved our RC colas and our Moon Pies.

Willym said...

I'd go for the manicure too maybe a pedicure too ... let someone pamper you for just a bit... keeping busy is the secret so seems to me you're doing the righ thing.

more cowbell said...

It's not silly, you nailed it, it's about asserting that control over the things you CAN control. It's better than hiding under the covers, eh?

Miss Janey said...

Miss Janey can't count the times she has sought life improvement through a cut and color. We do what we can to feel like something is within our control, don't we?

sageweb said...

That list looks like a list for me. Need any help??..except the cut and color...can't do that. But I am a big housecleaner, and a super Trader Joe's shopper. That is what I live off of.

So stop by the wine section, get the cork out and go sit on the porch with the hubby. Don't worry about wine glasses...something else to clean...Oh don't let him have any.

Elizabeth said...

Will: If i can get an appointment tomorrow at the hair salon, I might just go for the whole deal!

Cowbell: I know, you do what you can, because it's all you can do. So I'm cleaning and organizing like a mad woman.

Miss J: Women and their hair. It's a mysterious and symbolic relationship, isn't it? When I was still dating, every time I broke up with anyone, I got a new style.

Sage: I have a feeling you'd be a really nice person to have around at a time like this, and I certainly wish I could take you up on the offer!

No, the husband can't drink wine. it interferes with his anticoagulent medication. I bet you'd be a fun drinking buddy too.... oh well.

Claire M. Johnson said...

Yes, I, unfortunately, understand the whole process all too well. I also scurried around like a mad thing trying to straighten things up and stocking the refrigerator, etc. So things would be nice and together. For when I came home. So, when he *comes home* things will be nice and together.

Doralong said...

asserting what control you can manage over the situation is the only rational thing to do.

And a cut and color makes perfect sense to me.. But Wills is right, go for the mani pedi while you're there.

citizen jane said...

Oh, my friend. I totally understand that need to try and control the uncontrollable. Went through a variation of it myself when Will was in the NICU and all I could do was just look at him in the isolet.

Get that cut and color done. And just for those couple of hours while you're at the salon, try to just be. There's nothing you can do about anything while the color's on your hair. Trust me.

jason said...

I like yellowdog granny's suggestion of moon pies and sodie pop. That has *got* to help. I think you should indulge.

And I don't know what a "Dublin Dr. Pepper" is, but I like the sound of that too.

Elizabeth said...

Jason: I'm guessing there's likker involved.....

Java said...

Oh, darlin', not silly at all. We cope the best we know how. Blessings!